FAQ from

Uses and Benefits of Surrogate Partner Therapy

Surrogate Partner Therapy has been known to be highly beneficial for people who might have the following situations, issues, concerns, or challenges.

Relationship Challenges — Surrogate Partner Therapy has been proven to be very healing for people who have experienced trauma in relationship and for those who have difficulty in attracting, creating, and/or sustaining intimate, healthy bonds with loved ones. It is true that engaging in relationship gives one an opportunity to heal these deep seated issues, but without the proper tools, it is easy to fall back into old patterns of behaviors and to deepen the record groove of distress. In Surrogate Partner Therapy, a safe and nurturing environment is created by establishing a ‘temporary’ relationship with a highly trained professional in which to learn and implement these tools. In this carefully designed container of loving exploration and acceptance, almost any limitation can be transcended.

Emotional and Sexual Trauma — Sometimes abuse survivors have an acute memory of the terrible trauma they suffered. When that experience is foremost in their mind, the fear created by that event will prevent them from living life to the fullest. As described by a survivor: “My issue as an abuse survivor is a negative collection of memories and how it dwarfs the positive ones, which leads to not being able to attract a relationship where I could create positive ones. The pattern seems to have no end.” Surrogate Partner Therapy serves to create a collection of positive experiences to balance the negative ones from the past.

Sexual Inexperience / Late Life Virginity — Surrogate Partners are highly sensitive to the needs and feelings of those people who for one reason or another lack sexual experience. The point of surrogacy certainly is not so that someone may lose his/her virginity; there are much easier and less expensive ways to do that. Instead, the focus is on overcoming the limitations that have prevented this person from having intimate experiences. As levels of comfort and confidence are increased through surrogacy work, these skills can be applied to ‘real life’ circumstances readily and easily.

Sex and Disabilities — Sometimes people with disabilities are not privy to the sensual realms of their bodies. In Surrogate Partner Therapy, a safe and accepting environment is created for disabled people to explore and experience the sensuality of their own unique, physical vessel. They can:
• better understand their sensual needs/desires
• experience sensual likes and dislikes
• learn what capabilities are present and available
• enhance sense of self as a sensual/sexual being
• increase confidence and ease to better facilitate the possible discomfort of others.

Transgender Exploration — Surrogate Partner Therapy can offer a wonderful transitional period for those individuals who wish to explore newly transformed bodies.

Sexual Dysfunction — Specific sexual challenges, in particular those exasperated by stress or anxiety, respond well to the acceptance and nurturing provided by Surrogate Partner Therapy. This study of SPT and vaginismus illustrates its effectiveness. Other conditions include dyspareunia, anorgasmia, and dissatisfaction with orgasm.

Confusion around Gender or Sexual Orientation — We all have both masculine and feminine aspects to ourselves. As a result of living with the oppression of a heteronormative and cisnormative culture, many people have learned, and rightfully so, that it's not always safe to embrace who they truly are. Surrogate Partner Therapy provides a loving environment for a client to experiment with owning and accepting different sexual/sensual aspects, gender expression, and attractions so as to know and accept themselves more fully.


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