FAQ from

About Andrew

I am a Certified Surrogate Partner, certified by the International Professional Surrogates Association. I am currently accepting clients and referrals, primarily women (either cis or trans) who experience limitations in their intimate lives and/or relationships they wish to overcome.

"Andrew, you are doing the work you were meant for. Your intuition, sensitivity and empathy are just what is needed."

Dr. Cheryl Cohen Greene, 40-year Veteran Surrogate Partner and the real life surrogate played by Helen Hunt in the award-winning movie "The Sessions"

Andrew Heartman
November 2022
Photo: Denise Doyle

I recognize the extreme sensitivity of the issues my clients deal with, and feel that my most important function as a surrogate partner is to create a safe emotional environment. People have told me all my life that they feel safe around me. I believe it's the combination of the following traits that create this safety:

I am present. I have spent most of my adult life cultivating the ability to be really present, and by that I mean attentive, focused, and keenly aware of what's happening in the moment.
I listen. Sensitive and intuitive, I am an exceptional listener. My listening is fueled by a genuine interest and caring. My intention is to not only hear what you're saying, but also to help you say what you haven't been able to say.

“The way Andrew communicates is so clear it helps me be more clear, not only in my words but also in my thoughts. I feel really heard when I am with him.”   —Sue S.

I'm nonjudgmental. I have had several friends and former girlfriends who have dealt with sexual assault, so I have seen firsthand the effect that sexual abuse and its subsequent trauma can have on women's emotional and intimate lives. All of these experiences have engendered in me a deep compassion for an enormous range of human experiences. I am one of the most nonjudgmental people you will ever meet.
I am empowering. My intention is to empower your growth and confidence in who you are. I look for and see the parts of you that deserve to be honored, revered, respected, and loved. Once I see those parts of you, you will start to see them also. No matter what your age, body type, or lifestyle, your inherent beauty will be seen and accepted.

"Andrew's warmth and caring for everyone around him really
shows up and it is wonderful to be around."    — Ava

I am available. As a surrogate partner, I don't have an agenda to make a point, to be heard, or to satisfy my own emotional or sexual needs, and am fully available to support my clients on their healing journey. I’ve done a tremendous amount of healing work on myself, and as a result, I am completely comfortable with my own body, my sexuality, and my emotions.

I've been pursuing personal growth through relationships since I've been old enough to have them. I feel most alive when exploring interpersonal communication, intimacy, relationships, and personal growth. Although it has not been in any formal way, I realize now that I've been doing this work all my life.“

I see clients at several locations in the San Francisco Bay Area, including San Francisco, Oakland, and Fremont. I am also open to traveling to work with clients in intensive therapy and other geographic areas.

From Francetta (May 2018)

I just wanted to let you know what a tremendous impact the intensive had on my entire life. As you know I suffered from prolonged, severe childhood sexual abuse. I lived in constant fear of men, believing all men were dangerous. This thought invaded every aspect of my life. Due to keeping the abuse "secret," my voice was silenced. I was unable to express my sexual needs (as an adult) plus due to shame, guilt, rage, and grief, pleasure was never experienced. The intensive with you was truly transformative. I finally found "my voice" and my sexuality. Through the sensate focus, body image, and active/passive exercises, I came "home" to my true self. You taught me about proper boundary setting, self-care, good sexual health, effective, open, honest communication, vulnerability, and how to ask for what I desired. You did this all in the space you created of safety, trust, and connection, always taking every opportunity to break the stronghold of cultural, social, and religious conditioning.

The skills I learned can be applied to every aspect of my life. I am finally freed from my sexual prison. My wish would be that every woman who has experienced sexual trauma would know that true sexual freedom and healing exists for them. For the first time in my life (64 years), I am enjoying being a woman - I am enjoying and celebrating my body - I am loving my very being.

Reverend Francetta

Artwork from Francetta,
regarding our work together

November 2014


Co-Founder, Surrogate Partner Collective, 2020

Secretary, Executive Committee, Ethics Committee,
International Professional Surrogates Association
, 2011 - 2020

Training Coordinator,
International Professional Surrogates Association
, 2012 - 2015

Surrogate Partner Training,
International Professional Surrogates Association
, 2008

Interchange Counseling Institute, 2011

Sex Educator Training, San Francisco Sex Information, 2010

Professionally involved with healing and intimacy since 1997, including running a healing arts center, and practicing Breathwork, Energy Work, and Bodywork.

Regular staff member at the Loving Life Seminar, and in the Love, Intimacy, and Sexuality Workshops of the Human Awareness Institute, since 1998 and 2001, respectively.

Member, International Professional Surrogates Association

Member, Somatic Sexuality Professionals Special Interest Group of the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists

Certified Somatic Sexuality Specialist, 2014 - Present, American College of Sexologists International

Surrogate Partner Practititioner, 2014 - Present, Institute for Mind Body Therapy


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